What if the future isn't the point today?

Last night, my daughter had a hitting lesson. She wanted to skip it to go to the lake with friends. Meanwhile, I, being the responsible, future-oriented, totally not obsessive planner that I am, reminded her that she has a big tournament this weekend. I actually heard myself say, “This is important. You need to remember your priorities. Don't lose focus now.”

Playing college softball has been her dream since she was little. She’s been chasing it for years with a level of dedication that honestly puts most adults to shame. So of course, in my mind, the answer was obvious: you go to the lesson.

But then my insightful teenager looked right at me and said, “You’re not wrong, Mom, but neither am I. We’re just seeing it differently. Maybe I need a mental break instead of pushing through? Maybe I really want to spend some time with people I care about before I leave for college.”

Cue the record scratch.

Cue the pause.

Cue the tiny existential crisis.

In the end, she did go to her hitting lesson, because she is responsible and goal-oriented and apparently I've sent enough inspirational Instagram reels to at least cause her to pause and think. But her words stuck with me long after.

How many moments have I missed because I was too busy living in the future instead of the present?

I’ve spent so much time trying to “stay focused on what matters” that I sometimes forget that this moment matters too. The laughter at the lake matters. The quiet afternoons matter. The people we love matter. And the future, no matter how beautiful or promising, isn’t the only thing that deserves our attention.

Here’s the tricky part: I don’t actually have a clear answer for when you should push forward and when you should slow down. There is no flowchart. No magic equation. No “Find Your Perfect Balance in Three Easy Steps” handout.

Sometimes the future is the most important thing. Sometimes the moment right in front of you is the thing you’ll remember forever. And sometimes you won’t know which is which until you’re looking backward.

But I do know this: Taking a mental break in exchange for a moment of joy is not weakness. It’s not laziness. It’s not losing sight of your priorities. Sometimes it’s exactly what keeps you going. Sometimes it’s the thing that fuels your future, not derails it.

So next time you’re stuck choosing between “being responsible” and “being human" maybe remind yourself that you’re not a robot. You’re a whole person, messy, tired, joyful, complicated… all of it. And moments of rest, joy, connection, and genuine presence are part of what make the journey worthwhile.

And if you decide to choose the moment, just this once, just for today,

ask yourself:

Why not?